Making changes to become the person you want to be

Goblins and ghouls are coming – as they have every year for millennia. I know because my kids have been talking for weeks about what to wear for Halloween. My daughter wants to be a super-spy and my son has chosen Freddy Krueger.

Actually, dressing up – or guising as it was called – is an ancient tradition. Celtic people apparently believed the autumn festival time offered an opportunity for the dead and assorted spirits to pass from their realms into this one, and dressing up like them was a protection.

All the same, dressing up like someone else can be fun. Throughout the year, I meet people who also want to be someone else; or at least want to change an important aspect of who they are now. As Woody Allen once said: “My one regret in life is that I’m not someone else.”

If you want to change a part of your life, the first step is being able to explore how that part is currently not getting you the results you want. I suppose it’s like opening the hood of a car and actually looking at the machinery. The best way that I know of how to do that – not the only way – is through mindfulness.

With mindfulness you stop paying attention to the story that you’ve been telling yourself. The content doesn’t really matter that much. Person A is afraid of dogs and person B is afraid of pickles. Yet in both cases there is a structure to how each individual is making themselves afraid, and mindfulness is an excellent way to explore that structure.

The next step is about creatively imaging things in a way that makes you salivate. You know how good menus stimulate your imagination so that you can practically savour the food? Well, utilising your imagination so that the new you is equally irresistible eliminates the need for self-discipline at this stage. Who needs discipline to eat something delicious? Hypnosis is the best way I know of to utilise your imagination.

The final step is conditioning and practice.

Source: Belfast